Faced with a marriage crisis, there are strategies to save the relationship.
After the stage of infatuation has passed, it is common for problems and situations to arise that are far from the idyllic relationship that we imagined at the beginning.
However, both members of the couple can consider that there is still much to fight for. Thus, the first thing that should be discussed openly is whether there is a will to do what is necessary to solve the problems and move forward. To talk about this, you have to stay calm, leave the complaints, and focus only on knowing the position of both parties.
Effective communication is key to any type of personal relationship. It is even more so in marriage and, of course, in efforts to save and regain love.
Effective communication requires correctly expressing what we feel and think and listening with openness. This means that it is not only about talking but about connecting at the moment in which you are talking.
You have to look into each other's eyes, you have to have open-mindedness and empathy to listen to what the other says, and you have to have the ability to clearly express what we feel.
Admit Responsibility, Eliminate Accusations
During a marriage crisis, it is common to get bogged down in mutual accusations. A human reaction is to blame the other for the situation that is being experienced. However, the effort is required on both sides to stop this type of reaction.
The healthiest and most mature way to start working on what is necessary to save the marriage is to do a job of honesty with yourself, admit those things you have done wrong or omitted, and stop blaming the other.
Identify Leakage Mechanisms
It is important to identify them, and this requires an honest work of introspection. Each with himself must be done; that is, it is not a good idea for the other to blame these forms of evasion.
The most serious and obvious escapes are infidelity or some addiction. This does not require a lot of work to identify it, but you have to admit it openly (in the case of infidelities, the solutions are different) and look for solutions. Other forms of avoidance when a marriage is watery are excessive work, social networks, busy with other activities more than necessary, etc.
Once they have admitted the leaks they use, they must be eliminated. Therefore, if it has already been identified that some activities or situations function as escape or evasion to face the crisis, they must be eliminated.
That is why both sides' willingness to save the marriage is so important since it requires an effort to admit their faults rather than accuse the other. In addition to the desire to eliminate leaks to focus on what is needed, we must take the time and plan how to manage our time and our relationship avoiding these harmful escape mechanisms.